kicks wrote:Whoa!!! I didn't know AP did any real damage to his kid. I see him in a whole new light. I thought it was just people overreacting as usual. I got spanked and I'm grateful now for it. But there is a line to not cross.
Guy, yes I agree on punishment to correct the willful and intentional defiance, especially when the child's future safety and others could result from this continued behavior, and the willful defiance of the parents must be addressed. But no, there is no place for harming a child, none. A swat that is more of a love tap (which is what it really is supposed to be, done out of love, certainly not anger) administered after all explanations for the punishment is dealt with, it really is the correction of the child's spirit, them knowing they have hurt you by insolence. But never in anger, or some sick type of revenge. Ugly stuff. When my youngest son was little (as in under like 7) and he would have to be punished, I would always make sure I asked him what should be done under these circumstances, he would answer "a swat" he knew why, he knew it broke my heart, he knew I loved him enough to be the bad guy for his good. Sacrifice brother. Sacrifice your warm fuzzy comfort so your child won't be an unfinished product as an adult. He knows to this day all the whys of what went on, and he has thanked me personally for going the extra miles to make him what he is. But most of that is because he is just plain special.
It only had to happen maybe 2 times in his life thankfully. Funny part is, his older sister telling me something along the line of "dad, please don't confine me to my room! why can't you swat me?" because child you are too old, its over and you are out the door tomorrow. I know says she, that s what I want. Answer-which is why that doesn't happen, you would learn nothing. I never swatted her at all. No girl child of mine got touched. Well, unless mom went after them. hahaha IDK I guess the bottom line is-first when you have children you take a step back, its no longer you first, not anymore, they come first. That equates to you being willing to
be there in the first place, put in the time, effort and love. The first has to be love. Everything else is just dedication to them becoming the best they can be as human beings.
Later,
Peace !